Struggling with new life and not keeping up w/ Joneses

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Awesome. And trust me the other night I had dinner at a friends and they mentioned they had opened and served a $90 bottle of pinot noir and I couldn't tell the difference with the cheaper $40 bottle the other couple brought. But my palate isn't so refined. I personally just buy the cheap stuff and don't drink that much. The same couple had a $7500 tab for their wedding table drinks alone from just the champagne. They have very expensive tastes and can afford it though.

[Singuy]

Awesome. And trust me the other night I had dinner at a friends and they mentioned they had opened and served a $90 bottle of pinot noir and I couldn't tell the difference with the cheaper $40 bottle the other couple brought. But my palate isn't so refined. I personally just buy the cheap stuff and don't drink that much. The same couple had a $7500 tab for their wedding table drinks alone from just the champagne. They have very expensive tastes and can afford it though.

There have been studies using wine judges and blind testing expensive vs cheap bottles of wine. The conclusion was that even the wine judges didn't know what they were doing. The same judge would score the same exact bottle of wine the highest score, and the lowest score. There's a lot of BS in the world, it's your job to sort them out and not fall for the trap.

I see designer bags that cost hundreds for no good reason..all made in China like the discounted stuff from Ross. 20k purses not even made of exotic leather...7k dresses that's made out of poly/cotton blend...and can't be washed. It almost makes people seem like sheeps wanting these expensive items because some celebrity wears it.

I am okay with expensive houses/cars tho. At least you feel and see the quality going into them. A 70k Maserati is on a whole new level of engineering vs a 70k purse, or a pen costing 10k.

[bjl584]

I've never been one to care much what others were doing or to care what others thought of me. That attitude has helped me tremendously when it comes to managing finances. The Joneses aren't even on my radar

[rennigade]

There have been studies using wine judges and blind testing expensive vs cheap bottles of wine. The conclusion was that even the wine judges didn't know what they were doing. The same judge would score the same exact bottle of wine the highest score, and the lowest score. There's a lot of BS in the world, it's your job to sort them out and not fall for the trap.

Ive read similar stuff about wine...such as if you empty an expensive bottle of wine and fill it with cheap wine...just by people seeing the expensive bottle they will think its amazing wine. Same thing happened when a cheap bottle of wine was poured out and filled with expensive wine. People thought it tasted terrible. These were also by "professional" wine tasters. This is why when it comes to anyone who tries to tell you about a specific wine/beer/liquor and why its so great...tell them to go pound sand. You either like it or you dont. If you start to talk about the water used during the distillation, the hint of orange peel, how long it was aged, etc etc...you become a pretentious goober. Kinda like the hipster generation.

[DaveInPgh]

1. Who to say the Jones are rich?

THIS

I suspect there are some truly wealthy people in the surrounding neighborhoods, but chances are there are several that are faking it and it will catch up with them

[rennigade]

Isnt it ironic that I actually know a family with the last name Jones who are flat our broke and have debt up to their eyeballs.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I don't care about others but I struggle with my family's judgments.

[Spiffster]

You know what I dont get is the whole cost of living thing. I understand the premise but its ridiculous that the same exact job with the same exact responsibilities pays twice is much in one area than another. Sure housing, and to some extent taxes, are more expensive in these areas but everything else is the same damn price everyone else pays.
You will also notice that people in these particular cities drive nicer cars, have more recreational toys, shop at whole foods, and sometimes even work bankers hours, or less. I work 50+ hour weeks as a Database Admin and make half what I would in places like DC, NY, and SF...

[rennigade]

Sure housing, and to some extent taxes, are more expensive in these areas but everything else is the same damn price everyone else pays.

And thats why jobs pay a lot more. A large house in PA where my parents live costs around $300k. 2 months ago a house very similar in size sold where I live in maryland (near wash dc) for $850k. Almost 3x as much. I pay 3x as much in rent where I live vs PA.

Also...food isnt the same price. I was just in nyc and a burrito at chipotle was $2 more than what I pay in maryland. $2 isnt a big deal but if everything costs a little more it will add up significantly over a years time.

But just housing alone is enough to price most people out of the market unless their employer pays them significantly more than a place in east bumble.

I mean...why doesnt all developers/admins move to san fran and make $150k/year. Because even with that salary they struggle to get by.

Most people from smaller areas dont understand this concept. They dont understand how expensive housing is because unless you see it/experience it first hand...it doesnt register.

[Spiffster]

And thats why jobs pay a lot more. A large house in PA where my parents live costs around $300k. 2 months ago a house very similar in size sold where I live in maryland (near wash dc) for $850k. Almost 3x as much. I pay 3x as much in rent where I live vs PA.

Also...food isnt the same price. I was just in nyc and a burrito at chipotle was $2 more than what I pay in maryland. $2 isnt a big deal but if everything costs a little more it will add up significantly over a years time.

But just housing alone is enough to price most people out of the market unless their employer pays them significantly more than a place in east bumble.

I mean...why doesnt all developers/admins move to san fran and make $150k/year. Because even with that salary they struggle to get by.

Most people from smaller areas dont understand this concept. They dont understand how expensive housing is because unless you see it/experience it first hand...it doesnt register.

All good points... But one example for arguments sake. My brother lives in Davis, CA and bought his 3br 3ba house for 250k. Albeit that was around 2009. He works at an oil refinery, is paid hourly (blue collar), and makes well into 6 figures. Has 3 cars... orders most of his consumables on Amazon and pays less for most things than I do simply because he has more options in CA. His only debt is his mortgage.

BTW, housing is plenty expensive here in Denver.

Sure I could move to one of these areas, but I like Denver too much. I would rather just stay here and complain about how people in other cities make more than I do ;-)

[Singuy]

I actually argued that HCOLA are not paying enough! Making 150k/year is pretty much nothing if a typical crappy 70 year old house cost 900k...on the contrary, you can buy a brand new bigger house in a LCOLA for 250k, making 90k/year.

[rennigade]

Sure I could move to one of these areas, but I like Denver too much. I would rather just stay here and complain about how people in other cities make more than I do ;-)

Thats just it. You could move/make more money but with more money usually comes bigger cities...which means more people, no privacy, etc etc.

In terms of bang for your buck and quality of life...Denver may be #1 spot imo. Not a terrible amount of people...you can drive 1 hour in any direction and basically be in the mountains. Skiing is top notch and hunting is really good out there. Cant wait to visit again in Feb.

[Singuy]

I don't care about others but I struggle with my family's judgments.

How are family members judging you? Are we talking about your spouse or parents/uncles?

[MonkeyMama]

You know what I dont get is the whole cost of living thing. I understand the premise but its ridiculous that the same exact job with the same exact responsibilities pays twice is much in one area than another. Sure housing, and to some extent taxes, are more expensive in these areas but everything else is the same damn price everyone else pays.
You will also notice that people in these particular cities drive nicer cars, have more recreational toys, shop at whole foods, and sometimes even work bankers hours, or less.

Having lived in San Francisco, I would say that none of this is true. It's difficult to overcome the cost of living. But the housing costs there are absolutely absurd.

I personally didn't take a pay cut when I moved to a city with 70% cheaper housing. I have white collar friends in SF who make less money than I do.

The high cost of housing drives up the cost of everything.

Quality of life is substantially better in our lower cost region. But that's why we moved.

(In truth we moved from *the* most expensive city to a more mid-cost area. So maybe it's that middle area that is more ideal. But given our perspective, it's just dirt cheap to us).

[rennigade]

I actually argued that HCOLA are not paying enough! Making 150k/year is pretty much nothing if a typical crappy 70 year old house cost 900k...on the contrary, you can buy a brand new bigger house in a LCOLA for 250k, making 90k/year.

Thats a good point. Where im at we're priced out of a single family home unless we really stretch it...which im not willing to do...and the fact that we plan on moving to PA in the near future. We would have to settle for a condo or townhouse...and I refuse to be separated from my neighbor by nothing more than a couple inch thick wall. Thats why we continue to rent for now.