"Living Like No One Else" part 2 Sure Brings In The Criticism

[Singuy]

I started a Pharmacy Financial Class for students rotating in our teaching hospital so I can teach these 24 yr olds coming out of school with 100k+ worth of student loans how to live their lives "like no one else now so they can live like no one else later". I know I know, it's a Dave Ramsey quote. It is telling people to be frugal now while working on becoming debt free, so they can live their dreams later in life.

Too many students coming out of school making 120k just going buck wild with new expensive cars and living large(if I get a dime for every RPH living in a high rise that's more expensive than most people's mortgages...). My course focuses on debt to income ratio, taxes, interest, investing, tricks on paying off student loans, and budgeting. The reason why I give such a course is because I lived a life completely opposite of the norm and now I am on the other equation of "living like no one else".

Here's where the problem comes in..the second part of "living like no one else." My wife and I are 33, which is probably a little too early to "live like no one else" from what people have envisioned.

So we just bought a new Mercedes SUV (paid cash) and are in the middle of putting in a pool that is more on the luxury side of things(costs 100k after all said and done..also paying cash). All of a sudden, my words of wisdom (save/pay off your debt/don't go crazy with spending) no longer hold any weight.

The person who preaches for people to save is actually not doing what he preaches. People are generally not happy with the "living like no one else" part 1, so they will quickly jump for joy when their personal trainer is no longer on a lean diet.

I got a RPH, who loves to waste money on luxury goods, is right now jumping for joy because I am spending money like she does. The only difference between me and her is that I have a paid off mortgage, no credit card debt, and pay cash for my luxury goods. I also don't have 3 grown kids sucking 70k/year in private school tuition, or want to take out money from 401k for a kitchen remodel(her granite is no longer a trendy color). By the time my child is ready for PUBLIC school, my wife and I will have a net worth of 2.5 million....while her and her husband's net worth is not more than 300k currently and this is after earning 200k/year(average) the past 20 years. I don't think people understand the difference between paying cash and financing.

My wife and I are in the position we are in because she dumped every dime she made into student loan debt and I dumped everything I made into mortgage. I paid off my mortgage after 7 years (from 25yr old till last year), and it took my wife 2.5 years to pay off 180k worth of student loans. I drove my high school car in those 7 years and the wife had a beat up Honda civic with tape on the windows.

Perhaps if I were in my 50s, then people would be like "ohhhh..there's a lot of truth to what he is saying..that's why he lives like a millionaire now..."..but when I am in my early 30s..it's just not sending the same message.

[Like2Plan]

I only know about Dave Ramsey via threads on discussion boards, so it would help if you could you clarify what part 1 and part 2 are. Is part 1 the completion of the baby steps and part 2--living debt free and living like no one else?

As I was reading your thread, I was thinking kudos to you for providing a Pharmacy Financial Class and also that the students would do well to heed your advice as you have already accomplished some amazing financial goals.

But, are you saying that now you have abandoned the debt free life style and you financed the Mercedes and the awesome pool? Or, have you continued living a debt free life style and you accomplishing some of your dreams earlier than normally would be expected? The second one I would think would lend even more credibility to sound financial management.

[Singuy]

I only know about Dave Ramsey via threads on discussion boards, so it would help if you could you clarify what part 1 and part 2 are. Is part 1 the completion of the baby steps and part 2--living debt free and living like no one else?

As I was reading your thread, I was thinking kudos to you for providing a Pharmacy Financial Class and also that the students would do well to heed your advice as you have already accomplished some amazing financial goals.

But, are you saying that now you have abandoned the debt free life style and you financed the Mercedes and the awesome pool? Or, have you continued living a debt free life style and you accomplishing some of your dreams earlier than normally would be expected? The second one I would think would lend even more credibility to sound financial management.

Sorry I had to edit my post above to be more clear. I paid cash for the car and paying cash for the pool.

[disneysteve]

Good for you for teaching the class.

Sad that people continue to just not get the message that it's okay to have luxury stuff if you can afford it. When they see someone driving a nice car or living in a nice house they automatically assume that debt was involved.

[autoxer]

The person who preaches for people to save is actually not doing what he preaches.

It's a shame that perceptions are so misaligned with reality.

Did you tell miss RPH that you dealt with your debt first, before pretending to be wealthy?

[Singuy]

It's a shame that perceptions are so misaligned with reality.

Did you tell miss RPH that you dealt with your debt first, before pretending to be wealthy?

Oh she knows, but can't seem to tell the difference. In her head, all she can see is "I told you luxury goods are the way to go!..see you want them too!!!!!"..

So now she feels great about buying luxury goods because someone who is known to be financially responsible is doing what she does....so in some weird twisted way..she now feels she is just as financially responsible as I am..lol

[Like2Plan]

Oh she knows, but can't seem to tell the difference. In her head, all she can see is "I told you luxury goods are the way to go!..see you want them too!!!!!"..

So now she feels great about buying luxury goods because someone who is known to be financially responsible is doing what she does....so in some weird twisted way..she now feels she is just as financially responsible as I am..lol

So, I'm still trying to figure out what kind of advice you are looking for here. At first I thought this was related to your students in your Pharmacy Financial Class, but now I'm think maybe this is just another rant about RPH?

If this thread is about the students--they should be impressed by what you have been able to accomplish in such a short period of time--Another lesson is if they wait just a few more years and get themselves firmly established financially they will be able to easily afford some of the finer things in life.

If this thread is about RPH, well I wouldn't think there is anything you could say or do that will change her mind (or change her ways). The only problem I see is if RPH asks for help from you in the future. Is that likely? Would you feel obligated to help?

[disneysteve]

So, I'm still trying to figure out what kind of advice you are looking for here.

I didn't get the impression OP was looking for advice but rather just venting frustration.

[Singuy]

This is more of a discussion than advice seeking.

Sorry yes I am ranting, but also I find it frustrating how people treat financial responsibility as nothing but comical.

Do we even have the right to buy luxury goods if luxury goods are what caused people to be in financial trouble? I feel people are seeing how I am a hypocrite, demonizing luxury goods (when other people buys them) but then goes out and buy it myself. People just sees this and nothing else. They could care less if you have the money or not. When someone is asking you for financial advice and you tell them perhaps you shouldn't buy this house you can't afford, or that car you can't afford..you all of a sudden shouldn't be buying cars /houses THEY can't afford.

This rph I am ranting about just so happen to be the person who assigns all students to my course. People like her already want to roll their eyes at my financial teachings, I feel that by me "living like no one else" part 2 just gives them more ammo to counter my intentions.

So I guess in order for my teachings to hold more weight, I must continue to live like a monk..

[Like2Plan]

This is more of a discussion than advice seeking.

Sorry yes I am ranting, but also I find it frustrating how people treat financial responsibility as nothing but comical.

Do we even have the right to buy luxury goods if luxury goods are what caused people to be in financial trouble? I feel people are seeing how I am a hypocrite, demonizing luxury goods but then goes out and buy it myself.

This rph I am ranting about just so happen to be the person who assigns all students to my course. People like her already want to roll their eyes at my financial teachings, I feel that by me "living like no one else" part 2 just gives them more ammo to counter my intentions.

So I guess in order for my teachings to hold more weight, I must continue to live like a monk..

Light bulb moment-this makes perfect sense now. I think I would be more than a little annoyed by this. It sounds like rph doesn't get the "living like no one else" part 2 is the whole reason for doing part 1.

The good news is you have the podium when you give the class and you can explain that part. Not everyone will get it. But, the few who do will be very lucky to have done so early on in their life.

[msomnipotent]

Some people are desperate for an excuse to live beyond their means, but I would think about changing the mantra if more than a few walk out of your class with her attitude. It would seem that they just are not getting it. I know several people like this, and I have given up trying.

I loaned my copy of the Millionaire Next Door to my sister and (now ex) husband. They continually got into financial trouble and had to move back into my parents' home for the second time just so they could pay off their bills and start fresh. Nevermind that they had to disrupt my nephew's life and move halfway across the country and take over a house that already had 5 people in a 3 bd/1ba house. AGAIN. But I made a special point about the people mentioned in the book buying their watches from JC Penney. I thought she would catch on that wealthy people hold on to their money by not spending it, or at least not buying designer when they didn't need to. They went out and bought a bunch of clothes and watches for themselves at JC Penney. Really. I actually slapped my forehead when they told me. She said they wanted to look like rich people.

[bjl584]

There's nothing wrong with living it up so long as you can afford it. Age doesn't matter. That is the message that I would try to drive home. Ignore age, and income. Focus on net worth and debts. Some people can live like no one else in their 30's. Some have to wait until their 60's.

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

But I made a special point about the people mentioned in the book buying their watches from JC Penney. I thought she would catch on that wealthy people hold on to their money by not spending it, or at least not buying designer when they didn't need to. They went out and bought a bunch of clothes and watches for themselves at JC Penney. Really. I actually slapped my forehead when they told me. She said they wanted to look like rich people.

Doh! That's a fine example of missing the point-- willfully, I'm guessing.

[jbjr12]

I would think you're current lifestyle would be a great example to the class. Far greater than someone older than you. I think most people assume that they would need to sacrifice for most of their lives just to "live like no one else" when they are at retirement age.

You seem to be a good example that the work part actually doesn't always take that long and as long as the right habits are instilled early people could live pretty well much earlier then they might otherwise imagine.

[Spiffster]

Singuy, well done. I wish I had that kind of discipline through my mid 20's. I was too busy living beyond my means, and spending way too much money on alcohol, bars, etc.
I cleaned up my act around my early 30s and we are aiming to have the house paid off by the time I am 40, so three more years. I do still get the itch to buy frivolous things though, but at least now we can pay cash for just about whatever we want.

I think the criticism you are experiencing is just envy.